i dedicated my morning wood to you.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
