On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
