I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize