Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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