who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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