I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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