some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
