So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
