Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
