I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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