Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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