Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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