Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
