with your own penis?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Randomize