Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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