absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Randomize
