Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
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