I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
