I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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