I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
