my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
