she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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