how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
