What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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