Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
