I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
