Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize