I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
