After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
