And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize