He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize
