There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Randomize
