he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
