Me. At least after what I've been through.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
