Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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