South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
