I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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