I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
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