I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize