I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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