Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
