So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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