Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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