just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
3 2 1 whiskey
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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