I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
