You work out of a Hotel?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
this will be a night to untag.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
