The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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