Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
