Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize