What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Damn victory sex feels great
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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